Ever since Rian Johnson decided to troll the fanbase with his hipster-ironic The Last Jedi - intent on taking down any white male hero to please Disney’s liberal leadership - Star Wars has been on the decline. But don’t blame that hack Rian, who clearly doesn’t know a thing about screenwriting. Don’t even blame Kathleen Kennedy, who would never have gotten her job if she wasn’t a woman, but you know, still worked under George Lucas and Steven Spielberg when she was young. The problem is Disney. Disney is ruining Star Wars.
Disney is clearly pulling the strings, a sort of George Soros of entertainment, to try to ruin Star Wars by flooding the market with Mary Sues like Omega and Rey and General Leia Organa and Ahsoka or Jyn Erso or Rose Tico. Pretty much the only non-Mary Sue was Cara Dune, because you can tell she works out, but then they fired her because she spoke her mind and The Mouse Can’t Allow That. All they ever supported were demure women like Carrie Fisher. When Disney insists on telling its writers to include female leads in its scripts, it ruins the very thing it spent so much money on, because you can just tell they’ve got an agenda and that agenda is politically correct, to use a term I learned from my grand parents. (It means woke.) The company that made feminist stories like The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast (which are not at all about sacrificing your uniqueness for a man or Stockholm Syndrome) clearly has it out for normal people who believe normal things like that women aren’t naturally gifted and if they are, they’d better bring the receipts.
Disney clearly doesn’t understand Star Wars. First of all, Star Wars isn’t political! It’s a Christian allegory where Luke Skywalker is Jesus Christ who sacrifices his Father for us, just like what happens in the Bible. Star Wars is also not a rousing story about how to be a good friend, how to treat people well, and fighting against fascism. If you’ve read any of the Legends stories (thanks for taking canon and flushing it down the toilet Disney censors) or played Knights of the Old Republic II, then you know that Star Wars is a tragedy about how we can never overcome the Darkness within ourselves - which is rad. It’s like when Superman in Zack Snyder’s magnum opus Batman v Superman: The Dawn of Justice said “No one stays good in this world” and flies off to kill Batman because Lex Luthor is violently threatening his mother. That’s real, and that’s what Star Wars was all about before George Lucas sold his company to Mighty Mouse and ran off to build a museum or something.
I mean, look, when the prequels came out the Gen Xers complained about them because they just don’t understand George Lucas’s vision. So we got exactly what they were begging for - movies by different directors and writers with fancy actors and Harrison Ford and Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher back again. It’s all so backwards and that’s why those movies never made a dime. Clearly if they had just created Lucas’s original outlines about midichlorians and then finished it off with Colin Trevorrow’s Duel of the Fates that would have been far less political and far more popular. Who didn’t want to watch blinded Rey Solana nearly get killed by Kylo Ren? I know I did! I wanted that after I found out I could have had it and didn’t get it. If I’d seen it on screen, I would never have complained about it, because I would have gotten exactly what I wanted, at last.
Where was I? My point is…look at the state of Star Wars. We haven’t had a new movie in FOUR YEARS, which is forever. Yes, it took them three years between each original movie and sixteen years to put out Episode I and then three years between the prequels and then ten years between Episode III and Episode VII and then we got five Star Wars movies in four years, which I complained about at the time as being too many, but come on. No new movies? All we have gotten is anime series, three seasons of The Mandalorian, Obi-Wan Kenobi, one season of Boba Fett, a season of Andor, Tales of the Jedi and The Bad Batch. Plus some okay video games, or whatever. Why are they making us wait so long? It’s because they’re trying to ruin Star Wars. And like, the new shows are clearly not as popular as they used to be. Sure The Mandalorian’s third season is more popular than Boba Fett or Andor but they should make more shows like Andor, the numbers tell the story, it’s not about how popular a show is, unless I don’t like the show, because then the numbers prove they should have listened to me before they made all these shows. It’s just science. Facts people. Look them up. They’re a word.
I think the only way to make them listen is a boycott. Or, if I’m not going to stop consuming these products, then perhaps they should create a wiki-style open source script writing approach so We The Fans can make the Star Wars we want. Or Disney should sell it back to George Lucas, who clearly would take it back, he’s miserable, just doing set visits and walking around aimlessly. Why wouldn’t they sell it back to him? That’s my question.
No matter what, it’s obvious these corporate overlords hate the audience, don’t want our money, are pushing a left-wing agenda with women and people of color and gay people and all sorts of people I never would see in the real world if not for Disney shoving them down our throats.
Speaking of throats, use your voice like I do!
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